I miss many things that made my childhood
awesome, but one of the things I miss most is my time machine. In it I would
embark on adventures, breaking the laws of time and space, going back in time
to ride dinosaurs, or into the future to stop the bound to happen zombie
apocalypse. My time machine would take me whenever my heart would desire, that
is of course until my mother asked me to stop being an idiot and get out from
under the bed. I would leave my time machine, amused by her simple mind’s
inability to decipher the intricacies of time travel.
As I grew older, I too would suffer the same
fate as my mother. Time travel, lost its appeal. But occasionally, I would long
for the good old time travelling days, mostly while enduring an afternoon
double lesson, I would yearn for the days when I would travel into the future;
or after exam results were out I would long to go back to the past. Sadly
though, the older I grew, the more detached I was from time travel. Then a few
days ago, while staring for a long time at nothing in particular, I had a
brilliant idea; and from this idea, the time traveler was reborn.
So what if I had become too big to fit in my
old time machine (plus going under the bed at my age is just unnecessary and
wrong) I would still travel to the past, but leave my body in the present. Yes
people, kind of like Inception.
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| Any moment now and she'll leave the room |
This is how I would do it, I will write to a
letter to my past self, then send it back in time, then…
As we come to the end of this year, there are a
few things I feel I need to know before I get into this year…you see?
Inception. I feel I need to be warned about 2012. Maybe future me will thank
me, maybe I’ll mess up with the time-space continuum and cause the world to
implode. Let’s see what happens.
Dear Ras of 2011,
So I finally rekindled your old passion, time
travel. Yes, I know you are excited, yes, you are welcome. Now calm down…get
from under there it works differently now! Anyway, I’m writing this from 2012,
December, oh, ya, the Mayans and the makers of the movie 2012 are idiots, the world did not end. There were a few floods,
but only on Lang’ata Road, nothing serious.
I thought you’d be better off if I let you know
a few things that happen in 2012, then maybe your year won’t be [I left out
this adjective to add some suspense. Some motivation for you to come to the
future and slap me].
So you know that girl you are ‘in love’ with?
The one you almost broke up with her last week but thought she was the one
you’ll end up with? Ha! You are wrong…again. Turns out she wasn't the one and
you’ll get your heart yanked out and stomped to little bits, before she puts in
tiny shards of glass in it then stomps on it again.
But wait, before you text
her, you’ll have some good moments somewhere through the year, but you’ll still
be punched in the gut by cupid, so if I were you, and I am, you’d run like a
man attacked by bees (and that’s really fast).
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| Well he should have run faster... |
You know how we don’t like Valentines Day?
Well, you’ll run away from the pressures of the ‘big day’ and go on a road trip
with the boys. I feel like saying spoiler alert; but you won’t make it to
Tinderet. The six-gear Toyota Alex you’ll be in will veer of the road and roll
severally. Don’t worry, you won’t die; no one will. The next morning you’ll
look at the car, totaled, then you’ll have mushy existential moments that will
make you appreciate life, you’ll even blog about it. Of course you’ll ride on
that story for a while and then people will move on, then you’ll come up with
some sappy story, but no one will care because in that story you don’t almost
die.
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| Oh snap! I was in there? |
Life will be hard in the coming months. You’ll
hate your job, you’ll be in a relationship you really shouldn't be in but you
won’t see that because you are an idiot and you’ll be in love; two things that shouldn't mix. But you’ll take a bold step: you’ll quit your job. That of
course doesn't help at all because in addition to food and rent, you still have
to woo a certain lady, so you will have to embrace poverty.
Just as life hands you a few more lemons, your
heart, as I mentioned earlier will be…okay fine, the first time was enough. So
jobless, loveless, and almost hopeless, you will say F.U. to the world and go
on a pilgrimage on Mount Kenya. Of course to you it’s just a trip but wait till
you come back.
On the mountain you will see God, you will see
a new you, who looks really like me now, a much less crappy version of the
current you, you will be broken, you will lose all will to fight for that
relationship, you will push yourself beyond your limits and you will achieve
everything you had set out to. In addition, you will meet a girl. Now remain
seated you dim bulb.
Yes, she is an amazing lass, you will like her,
she will be everything you ever wanted, she will let you in and you will let
her glimpse at your sorry insides. It won’t be anything serious at first, but
she will leave an impression, and you will blog about her, and in the coming
months you will spend more time with her, but your broken heart will try hard
to keep all feelings at bay, and that is a good thing. (Future me just wrote me
and told me to keep it that way a while longer, just a while…) so fret not, you
will learn the art of emotional restrain, but by Jove will she amaze you!
She will challenge you, and ask you hard
questions, questions about your life, and your art. Consequently, you will
write more; about her, about life, about anything, but only because she will
text you every day at 6, and ask you to write, and you will.
Your writing will grow, well people will tell
you that. You’ll question your writing, want to hang your pen (huh?) but you’ll
keep on. Then one day, something amazing will happen. You will get that job
offer you always wanted. And before you are done celebrating, you will get news
that you've been accepted for the Master’s degree you always wanted. This will
be the beginning of a turnaround in your life. Don’t worry, you won’t mess it
up.
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| You will become him...well not yet |
Often you will ponder about the year, how you
almost died, how you got your heart broken, how you lost (quit) your job, how
you met God on the mountain. You will be more aware of the events in your life,
and as you sit through class, looking at your classmates, most of them more
than ten years older than you, you will be thankful.
Somewhere in there after a really cool seminar
presentation and later a film festival, you’ll go home late. On the way a group
of evil ninjas will accost you and rob you of everything, including your sense
of security. Your computer, work, manuscripts, school notes, seminar
presentations, and notebook containing all your world domination schemes will
be lost. But on the next day, through a miracle of sorts, you will rise (a dark
knight) and you will be strengthened by the one thing the robbers didn't get,
your hope.
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| If they looked like this it wouldn't be a robbery. |
One day, while you travel through Ukambani, you
will picture the whole year in one blog post, you will think of how best to
write it and you will think of writing a letter to yourself. As you pass the
shady pub on the hill you will smile, remember all the good things that have
come out of 2012, you will text her, you will think of the research project you
are working on, you will think of this blog, and you will think of your manuscripts
yet to be published, and you will wish that you, a year ago, would only know
what is in store for you. I know, Inception.
Happy New Year everyone. To bigger things.
